My team won the Beach City Sports Premier league championship this past Saturday. 
We were all very excited; I brought mini bottles of champagne, and we popped them to celebrate.
Football has been a big part of my life in Orange County. Playing on the beach almost every weekend almost year-round has been amazing, and winning the top division this season was just icing on the cake.
Last weekend, I tried out for the LA Temptations of the Legends Football League, something I’d been threatening to do since before I moved here but something I hadn’t done for a number of reasons—reasons that didn’t go away once I’d reached the next round.
I want to compete at a higher level, I want to play football, I want something to train for—but I’d also have to specialize, to quit playing sand volleyball, quit trying new sports or classes in order to focus on building a football body and skills. And I don’t think I’m willing to do it. I’m also 30! Time to retire for a sports announcer gig.
And there’s another piece: I recognize that having a professional career (especially largely online) doesn’t mesh with playing in a league once called the Lingerie Football league. Unfortunately, women still struggle to command respect in the business world, and having a hyper-sexualized image even as a powerful athlete won’t help garner that respect. Part of this most definitely is a feminist thing—click here. I’d like to be a part of challenging and changing the current sexual and athletic environment for women, but to do it while also pursuing big professional ambitions may not be possible. To say, ‘hey, I can do what I want with my time and my body and still deliver incredible professional results,’ would be awesome, but I don’t know that it’s worth the professional risk for this particular experience.
Ultimately, I’m grateful for football, in all its forms. I’m grateful for rec football, I’m grateful a generation of women is coming up playing football, challenging gender norms, and hopeful that those women will find a way to play football in a way that supports them as athletes first, females second. I’m grateful that trying out for the team gives me an opportunity to write and speak about these issues.
Sidebar: I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention that in some ways, I’m grateful I didn’t grow up playing football competitively—I don’t have to worry about concussions and brain damage caused by hits. And even if women get the opportunity to play, the football community has to figure out a better way to protect its athletes.